Caring Companions Of Atlanta

Helping People Live With Dignity

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The Reality VS. the Expectation of Getting a (great) Caregiver: The Care Giving Conundrum

This is the first in a series of posts that will define the reality of care giving vs the expectations most families have as they enter the care giving journey. We will also offer tips on how to make that journey successful.

Part One: The Great Care Giving Conundrum.

OK, seems simple enough. Mom or dad finally drops his or her resistance and decides to try a caregiver. All I have to do is call a home care company and tell them to have a caregiver here tomorrow. Well, yes and no. If all you want is a warm body and it does not matter if it is the same body day-to-day, you can likely find a company that can deliver.

The truth is, finding a great caregiver is a process and not a light switch you just flip on.

Understand the Great Care Giving Conundrum.

The conundrum is a simple, yet very unbalanced equation. People in need of assistance usually wait as long as they can before getting it…and, when they do, they want as little help as possible. On the other side of the equation, most caregivers want to work as many hours as they can.

It makes sense…for the person in need, it represents them starting to lose their independence. It also means dipping into the ever-cherished bank account.  I don’t know about you, but neither of those appeals to me very much! Often times, their ask is driven more by family hounding them to get help rather than their perceived need. So, they ask for a little help. Keeps it easy to stomach and affordable.

Back to the caregivers…as a whole, caregivers are largely underpaid (not because home care companies don’t want to pay them well, but the market sets the price).  Plus, they have families to take care of.  They don’t just want lots of hours, they NEED lots of hours to pay the rent and put food on the table.

The Request.

So, when the inevitable request comes in from a  family for two four-hour shifts a week, we normally have to politely explain that the odds of us finding a great caregiver that wants that kind of work is very slim. They (the family) are not at fault for asking…how would they know!? Seems like a reasonable request. The truth is, however, even if we could find a caregiver that agreed to work mini-shifts like that, the likelihood of them sticking around and being reliable is very low. It’s not that they are bad people…they just will leave when an assignment with more hours comes up. Food on the table.

So, they key learning here is as follows:

  • Be aware of the conundrum when you engineer you request to a home care company. Almost all of us got in this business because we love to help people. But we cannot help if we are not set up to succeed
  • Know that should short, infrequent shifts be the “ask,” you might have trouble finding a home care company that will accept your business. If one does , the body they deliver will likely be different shift-to-shift

Next up…the fallacy that no one can care for mom or dad as well as you can.

Happy reading!

Adam

 

 

 

What Can You Do if You Feel that Your Life Is No Longer Your Own?

Caregivers in Decatur GA: What Can You Do if You Feel that Your Life Is No Longer Your Own?

Feeling as if you have no control over your own life is no way to live, but too many caregivers push themselves into that situation. It’s not too late to fix that problem.

Make Time for Yourself, No Matter What

Being a family caregiver often means that you’re on the clock all day, every day. That can also mean that you’re never quite sure when you can take time just for you. The thing is, you can’t just count on there being time left over for you and your interests. You have to set that time aside and make sure that you take that time, no matter what. If you don’t, you’re never going to be able to focus on your own self-care.

Find Someone You Can Talk To

Family caregivers can feel very alone in their caregiving journey. If that’s the case for you, finding someone to talk to that you trust is imperative. Depending on your individual situation, that might be as easy as talking to a friend about your feelings. Some more complicated situations may mean that you need to find a counselor or therapist to talk to. If you prefer a group setting, look for a support group so that you can meet other family caregivers who are going through the same situations you’re going through.

Get Help with Tasks on Your “To Do” List

Delegation is going to go a long way toward helping you reclaim some parts of your own life. If you’re not very good at asking for help from other people, it’s time to learn. Start out with smaller tasks and match them up with people who have offered to help you in the past. As you gain more experience delegating, you’re going to be amazed at how easy it becomes to ask for help from other people.

Let Go of the Guilt

Guilt is a powerful emotion and it’s often at the root of a caregiver avoiding her own self-care. The feeling usually is that every moment of every day should be devoted to helping their elderly loved one, not doing things for themselves. This isn’t true, though, and it’s damaging to you.

As you allow yourself to take time away from being a caregiver, you’ll regain some of the parts of your life that are just yours.

If you or an aging family member are considering hiring a professional caregiver in Decatur, GA, please contact the caring staff at Caring Companions of Atlanta 470-514-5954 .

We provide quality non-medical services to our clients in their homes or in a facility if that’s where they live. Our staff is available for care plans for extensive care 24 hours a day, 7 days a week or as little as 4 hours per visit. Reach out to us, and one of our outstanding administrative staff will meet with potential clients to assist them and their families in designing an effective, personal plan of care.